Lauren and Mark at War!

Things turn ugly for the former lovers as Mark posts a scathing Twitter rant aimed at his ex

Lauren and Mark in the golden (orange) years

Just when we thought the drama between Lauren Goodger and her ex Mark Wright was over, what with him recently getting married to former Corrie babe Michelle Keegan, a new scandal has reared its ugly head! In the last few days, there’s been so much drama surrounding these two that we can barely keep up!

In the early hours of Wednesday morning, ex TOWIE star Mark posted a series of tweets bashing Lauren for constantly using his name to make money, he wrote:

'Endless mentions RE: me and us is embarrassing. I really thought after lawyers being involved and polite pleas to stop mentioning me she... 

'Would stop. Maybe not. It's hurtful to think one person needs to mention YOU every week to earn a living. Being married to another women 

'Almost makes it unfair !! If your reading this, please PLEASE respect my wife and STOP. Everyone has a past, get over it !! I really didn't 

'Want to have to do this but enough is enough. I wish you well but leave me, my life and my wife out of it. Im sure there is other ways to make money.' [sic]

Mark's explosive Twitter rant

Ouch, that’s gotta hurt! It seems that Mark has finally reached the end of his tether following recent events that saw Lauren holiday in Dubai­- the same place he is on honeymoon with Michelle! This also follows the seemingly bitter Instagram post Lauren put up the day before Mark and Michelle’s fairytale wedding.

Not one to take it lying down, Lauren’s team were quick to jump to her defence and posted a response blaming the media for continually fabricating lies about Lauren. The statement read:

Mark is right - this situation is incredibly embarrassing.

'Week after week Lauren has to suffer endless source story lies printed about her in the press surrounding Mark. 

'The list is as long as it is ridiculous. It's hurtful for Lauren to constantly be painted in this way and for readers to actually believe it. 

'That is why Lauren has taken to her own column in the past to defend herself against ludicrous claims such as the one that said she was going to gate crash the wedding. 

'Anyone facing such embarrassing lies week in and week out is of course going to want to defend themselves.'

'Lauren has privately been in a relationship too and this unwanted attention surrounding her ex of many years ago is certainly not welcomed. 

'We would like to clarify that Lauren is paid the same weekly fee for her column every week whether it mentions Mark or not, and she has given no other interviews on him - despite the numerous offers. She once again wishes them nothing but the best.' 

Mark and his new wife Michelle

And to back up the statement’s claim that she is seeing someone, Lauren today posted a pic of her ex boyfriend Jake McLean confirming the are back together.

Phew! It’s becoming increasingly frosty between the former couple who were on and off more times than Ross and Rachael! Whether or not Lauren intentionally went to Dubai whilst Mark was there or posted the Instagram message about her ex, it seems that now is the time for the pair of them to truly move on. But the way things are going, thats unlikely to happen any time soon- so watch this space!

Don't make Chris Brown angry, you won't like him when he's angry!

Chris Brown has never been one to hold back, and his latest Twitter spat shows he has no plans to change!

He recently partook in an abusive exchange of words with US comedienne Jenny Johnson which began when Brown tweeted a picture alongside the comment "I look old as f**k! I'm only 23..." Johnson took it upon herself to respond to this, saying "I know! Being a worthless piece of s**t can really age a person."

The ‘Don’t wake me up’ singer obviously did an ‘OH HELL NO!’ (Including the finger snap I presume) and crudely responded “Take them teeth out when u Sucking my d**k HOE” to which Johnson replied: "It's 'HO' not 'HOE' you ignorant f**k." I quite agree, spelling is important!

What followed was a series of heated exchanges between the two, which included Brown tweeting comments such as "I should fart while ur giving me top" and “mom says hello... She told me not to s**** in ur mouth, wanted me to s*** right on the retina.” Eew, and also lol.

 Johnson seemed to back down from the confrontation in the end, saying “Okay. I'm done. All I got from that exchange with Chris Brown is that he wants to s**t and fart on me."

Rihanna herself seemed to later get in on the act by later posting a picture of the comments and tweeting “How does one find the time? We gotta do better than this!!" Her response certainly adds fuel to the fire that the pair are definitely back together; and that didn’t do it, then she must’ve used a flame thrower or got Charmander on board when she posted an earlier snap of Chris brown sprawled out on her bed! That’ll get the gossips talking- ingenious RiRi!

If the two megastars are really back together, then it seems that Jenny Johnson won’t be the last person who’ll be eager to give their opinion. But if their latest duet ‘Nobody’s business’ is anything to go by, I don’t think they give two hoots!

Whereeeee haaaave yooouu beeeen?!

Whereeeee haaaave yooouu beeeen?!, I here you ask? Well excuse me! I have a job I have to work; I can’t just sit around all day writing about celebrities! Although, that’s EXACTLY what I want to do for a living, if you haven’t gathered. Anyway, I’m here now, so what have I missed? Well loads as it happens, I hardly know where to begin!! Well how about I break it down:

Love is in the air

Where's your hand Russell?

• Well of all the ‘WTF’ moments, this really took the biscuit! I’m talking about Russell Brand hooking up with none other than Geri Halliwell! Now this is a pairing that I do not get. I heard that they hit it off at the Olympic closing ceremony, where they both performed, and bonded over a mutual love and sandwiches and books. Now, I know that Russell loves to spice up his sex life, but I wasn’t expecting this!

• Apparently everybody’s favourite ‘I’m angry that my ex dumped me so I’m gonna write a song about what a heart-breaking b*****d he is’ singer Adele has married her lover Simon Konecki in secret. The ‘Someone like you singer’ who is due to give birth in October apparently wed her fiancé sometime last week and according to a source it was a ‘fabulous occasion.’ Well, whether reports are true or not, I wish them every happiness.

'This way Ashley, er  I mean Tre!'

• Chezza’s got a new man! Ok, so that’s all the excitement I can muster with this story, but it seems that Cheryl Cole has well and truly replaced Ashley by hooking up with a hot American dancer- nice one. The pair have actually been seeing each other for a few months and apparently its love. Ashley even popped around for a cuppa and offered the pair his congratulations before joining Cheryl’s fella Tre Holloway in a hearty game of croquet. Ok, I made that last bit up, but one can dream.

• She’s done it! Ok, not quite at the altar, but Jennifer Aniston has got engaged. The Hollywood actress, who has starred in legendary films such as ‘Along came Polly’ and ‘Marley and me’ has accepted boyfriend Justin Theroux’s proposal on his 41^st birthday. Looks like Jen has finally found her lobster! And if you don’t know what I’m talking about, then just leave! Go on, get off my blog!!

So so so scandalous!

You think I'm posting the real pic so I get sued? I think not!

• Last week the world was rocked by a royal scandal. No, not that the Duchess of Cambridge has worn the same dress again (seriously guys, get over it!), but that Prince Harry has been flashing his crown jewels in a Las Vegas hotel room! Now for some, this is just a normal Friday night, but for a member of the royal family, it’s a bit frowned upon. According to reports, the Prince was having some fun splashing around in the pool with Olympic swimming champion Ryan Lochte (as you do) whilst on his hols. He later then invited a bevy of bikini-clad beauties to join him in a game of strip billiards. Well, to cut a long story short, he wasn’t very good and ended up parading around starkers with a lady friend. And because Hazza was amongst close friends whom he has known for years and can trust (ahem), a picture was taken and ended up in the papers! Now how did that happen?

• David Beckham and Katherine Jenkins. Now there’s two people you wouldn’t normally put together, but somehow they’ve been accused of having an affair.  But in a strange move, Katherine added fuel to the fire by angrily denying the affair on Twitter instead of ignoring the false accusations. She tweeted ‘I’ve read some horrible rumours on here & want u 2 know I absolutely deny I’ve had an affair with David Beckham.’ ‘The rumours are very hurtful, untrue & my lawyers tell me actionable.’ Okay Kath, I believe you, but I’m not sure I believe Lily Cooper who decided to pipe up with her own defensive tweets: ‘I’m really upset at the hurtful rumours going round about me having an affair with Jay Z. My lawyers tell me they are actionable.’

• Lindsay Lohan has been accused and now cleared of stealing jewellery from a Hollywood house party. The ‘actress’ who was found guilty for stealing a necklace in February, was apparently...WAIT A MINUTE! I’m gonna stop right here. This is no scandal; this is just a day in the life of the train-wreck that is Li-Lo. Someone seriously needs to hurry up and make a Mean Girls 2 before her life really goes to hell. Enough said.

Oh Em Gee!

Yes, she actually left her house like this!

• The claws are out for Jasmine Lennard and Kerry Katona! The ‘model’, who played with Simon Cowell’s naughty bits for 6 months, has lashed out at Katona after she said that Jasmine needed psychiatric help in her magazine column. Kezza stated ‘I was hoping Jasmine Lennard would stay in the house because she is so controversial. 'I can't believe they apparently had to hide knives from her – she clearly needs psychological help!' This didn’t go down well with Jasmine, the first to be evicted from this year’s Celebrity Big Brother, who released her inner bitch (wait, her bitch is out and proud!) by blasting the former Atomic Kitten star on Twitter, she tweeted: ‘HA HA HA...YOU...think I need help. Well...i think YOU need to start using contraception get over @BrianMcFadden stop taking...’ ‘Cocaine,lose a few pounds&start focusing on your children not boyfriends.I think your vile.#peasant’. Well, that sure told Kerry! But Jas do us a favour and assess your own life first- and eat some pies while you’re at it!

• Cheryl Cole and Will.I.Am were involved in a car crash last night! But fear not my darling readers, it was a minor accident. Chezza and Will were driving back from a late night studio session, and it seemed that Will demonstrated his awesome driving skills by crashing into a parked car- not so dope. Whilst Will’s airbag inflated in his face and caused a nose bleed, Cheryl’s airbag failed to inflate and so she slammed head-first into the dashboard causing bleeding and minor bruising. Thankfully the pair, who have collaborated on ‘Heartbreaker’ and 3 words’, were ok, and both took to their Twitter pages to reassure their fans. Maybe, this is the earth’s way of telling the Black Eye Peas star to get rid of that stupid haircut!- maybe.

That’s all for now folks! ;)

Those pesky celebs!

So I stop blogging for a couple of weeks and what happens? Those pesky celebs cause so much drama and controversy I’ve got more juicy showbiz gossip than I can shake a stick at! So much has happened in celebville over the last couple of weeks that I’ve had to categorise the gossip and condense them into bite size (ish) chunks! So here it goes…

Feuds. 

Family feud: Tulisa and Dappy

• Celebs love nothing better than getting into a good old Twitter scrap, no more so it seems than Tulisa. The X Factor beauty has had a massive row with cousin and (what is now revealed) former N Dubz band mate Dappy. Laying into Dappy, who has a penchant for wearing stupid hats and saying 'na na naii’, Tulisa let rip after the rapper retweeted messages from fans who were trying to appeal to Tulisa to reach out to her band mate. Obviously enraged at being portrayed as the bad guy, Tulisa tweeted a string of messages to Dappy in which she apparently confirmed N Dubz split (I’m not going to try and translate what she says, work it out for yourselves!): 

@TheDappy u know my number mate..I dont know urs cus u aint gave it 2 me since u changed it... so dont gass the fans, u wana talk Im here."
"@TheDappy serious man I hold it down, dont make me start talkin real cus u won't like it nor will the fans, allow twitter,man up n call me.
"4 the ndubletts triena take sides... pls remember... dappy left ndubz, that's y we split, n wen he wanted 2 get away I tried 2 move him... In2 my yard."
"He left n got a new num n I aint heard from him since, he aint called or made contact, just tlks 2 the press about me. Sayin he misses me but where the hells my call, I don't even have his num! had 2 txt me dad 2 pass a message 2 him n got no reply."

She finished her rant by urging Dappy to call her and scolding herself for rowing so publicly. Over to you Dappy…

• Another Twitter row has also erupted (getting a bit boring now, isn’t it) this time between The Wanted’s Tom and TOWIE’s Mario. It all started when Lydia posted a pic of her and her mum reading a magazine in which they gave an interview. For some reason, Tom decided to have a pop and said ‘How ironic is that picture? Is that what you lot call yourselves these days for doing nothing!! #shocking.' This caused an outraged Mario to let rip, with Tom fighting back. I can’t be bothered to go into all the tweets (as there are so many) but basically Mario got labeled a 2^nd class Mark Wright whilst Tom was branded the ugly one in the band and just a backing singer to Max (the bald one in the group who is apparently the ‘fittest’). Can I just say that all these tweets seem to be true, so what’s the beef? Lydia, Lucy and Debbie waded in too but no one really cares.

Where's the love Cheryl?

• Celebrity dispute veteran Cheryl Cole has been ruffling the feathers of former X Factor mentee (is that a word?) Alexandra Burke. The 'Hallelujah’ singer has revealed that Cheryl has practically ignored her for the past year, failing to return the singers texts and calls.  This echoes claims from Cher Lloyd, who also confessed that the Geordie lass isn’t handy with the telephone and has failed to keep in touch with her either. Alex revealed this after Cheryl tweeted her out of the blue saying how hot she was in her latest video. Sounds like Chezza need to work on her people skills…                                                                                                                                                                         
• The Bachelor ‘winner’ Carianne (you know, the one with the voice that makes you want to kill yourself- or her) has slagged off ex ‘boyfriend’ Gavin Henson, branding him boring! She also stated that he tricked her and the whole relationship was fake. No s**t Sherlock! After watching that show religiously, we all knew that Gavin was as dull as Roy Cropper off Corrie and that it was probably more fun having a convo with a brick wall! You knew the score Carianne. Win the show, pretend to be interested for a while, make some money and then done! We all knew it was coming love, so stop kidding yourself!

Romance

• Love is in the air again for Mr. Lover Lover Jermaine Defoe. But clearly the footballer has had a recent bump to his head because instead of going for his normal glamour model/ reality star/ vacuous blonde type- he’s actually hooked up with someone who has a talent and isn’t a fame hungry airhead.  Step forward Alexandra Burke! Yes, Alex clearly pays attention to her song lyrics when she sang she wanted a ‘Bad Boy’. I guess dreams do come true! Although judging by Defoe’s track record with women, it’ll probably be more like a nightmare! Good luck with that one Alex!

• Another couple setting tongues wagging are pop stars Jessie J and Tinie Tempah. The two stars of British music have apparently been seeing each over for a few weeks and seem smitten, with openly bisexual Jessie spending a lot of time at his house. This romance, however unlikely, seems rather cute and fans no doubt are probably wondering if they’ll collaborate in the studio as well as the bedroom. It’ll bring music to their ears! (literally)

Babies

• A massive congratulations to The Saturday’s singer Una Healy who gave birth to baby girl Aoife Belle Foden last week! All the Saturday's girls were really excited and tweeted messages of excitement. Rochelle was recently seen with fiancé Marvin (lucky cow) going to visit baby Aoife and Una, who celebrated her first Mother's Day on Sunday. All together now- aaaww!!!                                                                                                                       

Ready to pop: Jessica Simpson

•  Breaking news- Jessica Simpson is STILL pregnant! She seems to have been carrying that bump around for about 17 years! Perhaps she had the baby ages ago but loved being preggers so much she walks around with a cushion stuffed up her top? Nonetheless, the singer (does she still sing?) looks like she’s about to give birth to a horse let alone a baby, so here’s wishing her a happy and safe birth whenever it is (hopefully sometime in the next decade).                                                                     
                                                                                                                          
  

Is that a nappy your'e waring Kris?

• Ok, so she may not be pregnant, but that doesn’t stop Kris Jenner from showing off her baby bump! The limelight hogging ‘momager’ decided that to celebrate son Rob turning 25, she’d post on her blog a picture of herself pregnant with Rob, in a style similar to that of Demi Moore (albeit years before). Yep. That’s what every 25-year-old guy wants to see. A picture of their mum, starkers (apart from a pair of white pants that looks like a nappy) with a huge bump that contains you as a foetus! Happy birthday Rob!

Other celeb news I can’t be bothered to categorise

•  Simon Cowell has threatened to axe the X Factor if this year’s series isn’t a complete success. This may very well be true what with the controversies surrounding the last series, but Mr. Cowell, isn’t this a convenient time to let this slip? A week before your other show Britain’s Got Talent is set to take on The Voice in the ratings war? I smell a rat!

• A sex tape has been leaked allegedly featuring Tulisa doing a naughty sex act, gasp! If this is true, then the former N Dubz singer is very stupid and may have ruined her X Factor career- unless Simon axes it first of course. Don’t these people ever learn? If you’re going to have sex, just don’t film it! Because as much as you love the person involved at the time, when you get rich and famous, they are only going to betray you and sell the tape! Unless of course, it’s your dream to be the new Paris or Kim… And following her row with Dappy, he responded to the sex tape news by tweeting 'Man this sex video fing is a bit rough! I knew Tulisa weren't talkin to me, but not cos she had her mouf full!!' Hmmm, don't know if that helps Dappy, but it's the thought that counts...

George in handcuffs? I'm not saying a word!

• Both Russell Brand and George Clooney have been arrested in non-related incidents. Whilst George was making people’s hearts melt by protesting outside the Sudanese  embassy about Syrian human rights abuse, Russell meanwhile grabbed a photographer’s phone and lobbed it through a law firm’s window! Tut tut!                                                                                              

• And finally 90’s band Steps recently performed at GAY, with Claire saying she doesn’t mind being the big girl in the band. The size 16 singer, who is happy with her size, doesn’t seem fazed that Lisa 'desperado' Scott-Lee is trying to be the hot one, despite everyone knowing that it was Faye that all the boys fancied. Even if she is bothered, she can always console herself with cake. And that’s not me being spiteful; Claire is actually hosting Lorraine’s Cake Club which aims to find Britain’s best cake. I think I’ll stop right here. As a treat for you, here's Steps doing what they do best: